Yes, a little slice of life. In this case, it was a slice of my left index finger, with a very sharp knife.
As it was, it was quite appropriate, as I was slicing a venison/beef
“summer sausage,” which, if I ate it, had a better shot at killing me than the knife did.
There was a LOT of blood, (who would have thought a finger could bleed so much?). I was quite calm. Many years ago, (in a past that is a blur now), as a “government employee,” I had used a knife on others, and seen plenty of blood. Because of that, I am not panicked or disturbed by it. I applied direct pressure and used all the other triage techniques that I knew, but it simply would not stop bleeding…heavily.
And so it was that I found myself in the Emergency Room getting stitches in the wee hours of Wednesday morning. I had only missed the bone by maybe an eighth of an inch.
What’s the lesson here? Well, there isn’t one…stuff happens, and it’s best not to get too worked up about it. Every “next moment” is a mystery, and sometimes it hurts. It’s not rocket science – stay calm and roll with what is presented.
But, maybe there is a lesson. It’s funny, really. I hadn’t picked up my guitar in probably a week. I had wanted to, but always found some excuse not to do it. Now that I CAN’T play, it’s all that I can think about. The lesson is to not take your opportunities for granted when they are before you, because you have no idea how long the chance will be there. I’ll be playing guitar again within ten days…but what opportunity are you putting off to another day. What if that day is taken from you, and never comes?
Experiences; that is how you know that you’re alive. The quickest road to physical death is to panic in a crisis. There was no chance that a cut finger was going to kill me, and I knew that. But, if I had panicked, the emotional ramifications would have been very destructive. Fear and anxiety are the killers of this world.
Stay calm, stay clear – always. It will pay immense dividends when it is an habitual, ingrained practice. And jump on your opportunities while they are before you. Don’t assume that you will have ‘tomorrow.”
Jesus is quoted as saying, “…he that hath seen me hath seen the Father…” [John 14:9]
In the Hindu faith, in the text, the Lakshmi Tantra, The Goddess Lakshmi is quoted as saying, “When I look out through your eyes and see another person, it is really me looking at myself.”
Other variations of Eastern spiritual practices espouse the tenet that all is One, and what we see as separation among each other, and from God, is but an illusion.
All three of these examples, (and there are countless more) are saying the same thing; we’ve seen God. That being the case, what exactly are you looking for?
Certainly Jesus wasn’t talking about his physical body – you know, the bearded carpenter – when He said “…he that hath seen me hath seen the Father…” He was referring to his actions. It is the love and the compassion and the power that is the Father, not Joe and Mary’s boy from over in Bethlehem.
We commonly think, if only sub-consciously, that we have not physically seen God, and among those that have had an experience through which they saw God, all saw something different. Just look at all of the varied pictures and representations of this power that have arisen throughout human history. And I fully believe that every one of them is an accurate portrait of that power, because the power of the Supreme is without any limitation as to form; like water, it fills the shape of the container that it is poured into.
But, if we lay all of those varied images aside, every single one of us has still seen that Infinite power that we call “God.”
If you have seen a man who radiates compassion, you have seen God.
If you see a woman who exudes the light of Divine love, you have seen God.
If you have seen a painting of Jesus, or a figurine of Shiva, you have seen God.
If you have looked in the mirror, you have seen God. Hmmm…having trouble with that one? Let’s see…God made the football and kicked it through the uprights and it exploded; scientists call it the “Big Bang.” [they just leave God out of it, because it cannot be explained by the human mind]. That makes ALL of it God, except you? Is that your contention? That’s a little tough to buy into. Maybe it is just that your behavior has been more that of the “space debris,” the physical form, rather than the power that gives it life, which resides within you and is formless.
Yes, we See God, in person, every single day. Perhaps we should make an effort to treat Him/Her/It a little better. And that includes how you treat yourself, too, not just those around you.
You know, you could study the ingredients list of any candy bar…and memorize it word-for-word. At that point, you could rightly be considered an expert on this particular type of candy bar.
You would know every single thing that went into it, and how much of each additive. Perhaps you would have even visited the factory, and become intimately familiar with the manufacturing process. Yes, there is nothing that would not know about this candy bar – and no one would have a shot of winning an argument with you about any aspect of the truth of its construction; you would know it inside and out. But honestly, all of this knowledge doesn’t tell you squat about this candy bar.
Pick one up off the shelf the next time you are in the grocery store and read the ingredients. Now, tell me how it tastes based on that knowledge. You can’t. All that you can hope to do is preach the wondrous benefits of this combination of ingredients. Why? Because you haven’t tasted it; you’ve only become an expert in everything that concerns it.
Do you know what the wrapper on a candy bar is? It is a marketing tool. All the right colors, an attractive name, and a description of deliciousness; all designed to “get you in the door.” If it is appealing enough, you’ll buy it – that’s the name of the game. Maybe you will like it, maybe you won’t. That’s a pretty innocent example, but let’s ramp it up a notch. Let’s say the product is beer, or cigarettes, or whiskey.
Let’s be totally honest. With a very few exceptions, no one likes beer, or cigarettes, or whiskey when they first try them. That’s the truth, and you know it. But, to be cool, or to be accepted, or just to have something, you keep partaking until you develop a taste for it. Then, after a while, you won’t even consider the idea of giving it up, even if it never really “fit” your life. Now we come to the most nefarious example of all – religion.
Religion is just like the candy bar business, in that, without attracting new buyers, “converts,” it will dry up and die. So it is a competition, to see who can package their idea of God in the most appealing way; the survival of the institution depends on it.
I can’t even begin to name all of the religions that are out there today, vying for your time, your attendance, and your financial support. Candy bars, with pretty wrappers, selling their idea of God and claiming to be the “best” and only true way. Ordinary logic would lead us to surmise that if only one, true way exists, then out of 100 religions, 99 would be wrong. But maybe it is possible that there is a unique truth for each of us – thus eliminating the concept of “one is right and the rest are wrong.”
I would recommend reading the labels, (the scriptures), and getting to know what these “candy bars” are about; that’s good information to have. But in the end there is only ONE thing that matters, and that is how it tastes.
Forget the rhetoric, forget about whether mom or granddad likes it, how does it TASTE to YOU? Is the taste blissful and unforgettable to you, or are you just “settling” for something that tastes OK, that is popular with the majority, so it must be the “right” path.
Don’t be swayed by pretty wrappers and soothing words. That energy that we know as God will deal with you directly if you approach It with an open and sincere heart.
Don’t “settle.” Take the time to find the path that has been prepared for you, and don’t be afraid to walk away from years of “tradition” to follow that path that is revealed.
Are you stirring up trouble? Are you making people uncomfortable with your crazy ideas and goals? The question is not accusatory. It’s not “bad” if you are. Truly, it’s kind of unfortunate if you aren’t.
You have ideas…big dreams probably, and they likely don’t fit with the mainstream of what society and the media have deemed appropriate, or possible. If you push these ideas, you are going to piss some people off – if you’re lucky, a LOT of people.
If everyone thinks your ideas are just peachy, and they have no objection at all, it is a definite sign that you aren’t really doing anything. Case in point, an article that I read today, from the Associated Press, of how a Virginia woman has been barred from establishing an Interfaith spiritual center on her own land.
This detestable affront to religious freedom is occurring in Independence, VA, (how’s that for irony?).
In her vision, ALL faiths are welcome. It is to be a place of harmony, wherein every major religion was to have a day to share their faith. HARMONY…love among ALL people. PEACE. Would you like to take a guess as to who is standing in the way of its fulfillment? Don’t bother, I’ll tell you: people who call themselves “Christians.”
Yes, down in Grayson County, VA, it would seem that God doesn’t approve of Divine love to all. The fundamentalist pastors have stood up in council meetings, thumping Bibles, and declaring that such a thing as people getting along and loving one another is totally anti-Christian. Well, here’s a news flash for you: Jesus wasn’t a Christian, (that term came long after he left His earthly body). AND, He didn’t start an exclusive “boys club” church before he departed – that, too, came later. If one has any concept of the root of His message at all, one would have to conclude that He would be in favor of the idea 100%.
The woman’s name who wishes to build this loving environment is Laura George, and I have nothing but tremendous admiration for her and her Godly desire to bring people together in peace and love. What we are seeing in the opposition to this noble cause is hatred, and fear, and ignorance – attitudes and actions that Jesus would have no part of.
Do my words piss you off? If they do..GOOD. Maybe they will cause you to THINK about the essence of what Jesus tried to convey, instead of quoting a stale, religious doctrine whose foolish rigidity is undoing everything for which Jesus stood.
Love. That is all.
And if you do not have that…if some rigid and exclusive doctrine is what controls you..then don’t bother to expect a place at the table in Heaven. Toss your scriptures into a waste heap and go have a beer; you’ve missed the bus, and you might as well get drunk, since you have already made the love of Jesus a profane thing by your hypocrisy.
Well, WordPress has put out a new, clean theme that I really like, so I made my own Header image to go on it, (incorporating the image bar from the old Rising Hawk Foundation Web site), and there you have it! [The amazing shield painting and hawk artwork on the bar were custom painted by Fantasy Artist extraordinaire Ed Beard, Jr. He is a man of great integrity, prodigious talent and heart, with an amazing wife and children, all of which seem to be talented, too. Where was I when all this was being handed out? Check him out at http://www.edbeardjr.com/]
The castle is a stylized photo of Eileen Donan castle in the Scottish Highlands, ancestral home of my proud Scottish Clan, Clan MacRae.
Overall, I think the type is easier to read, and it’s easier to glance at “teasers” from recent posts at the bottom. Hope you like it! (Let me know).
I don’t give a rat’s behind about the “paranormal,” because I don’t buy into the idea of ANYTHING not being “normal.”
Everything is, and therefore anything that happens is entirely normal in my view. It may be that you have never experienced such an occurrence before but, in my mind, that doesn’t make it “paranormal;” it’s just a piece of normal that you’re seeing for the first time. Nothing can be “abnormal,” or “paranormal,” in a world that, as a matter of course, includes ALL. That said, tonight, I had an interesting exposure to an aspect of normal that was new to my experience. The scenario was…shall we say…awkward. Nevertheless, I shall relate what happened with as much dignity as I can.
You see, I was in the bathroom…doing business that required me to be seated [if I were wearing a tie right now, I am sure that I would be loosening it, ala the late Rodney Dangerfield]. As we all know, such a position requires that one’s pants and undergarments be gathered around one’s ankles [sweating now]. Whew!
Anyway, I glanced down at my ankles, (as there wasn’t much else to do), and observed a defined, cylindrical shadow pass from my left ankle to my right ankle, and then disappear.
I was not afraid, and being of a scientific mind, I remained still and attempted to duplicate this “anomaly” through means of moving in various directions, messing with reflections, etc. No effort that I made to replicate the occurrence was successful. Whatever it was, it was apparent to me that “I” did not cause it to happen by any movement or activity on my part; it took place “without me,” so to speak. I have no clue what it means, if anything, or what it could have been.
So, I have shared this event with you for one purpose, and that is to point out that we know only the tiniest fraction of the overall truth of “reality.” Normal is huge – beyond our meager comprehension. We have so much to learn, (though, next time, I hope that I am not on the toilet!).
So is every other man, woman, or child that you may encounter…if you have ears to hear.
There are some whose lesson is what not to do, and there are others who demonstrate an advantageous way. Both are Holy teachers, and you would do well to open the eyes of your spirit and see this truth. If you look upon everyone as Holy, you will learn much.
Condemnation and judgment are the marks of ignorance of truth. Truth isn’t always in a beautiful, peaceful package. Sometimes, it appears as the most disgusting ugliness that you can imagine. But, if you know that ALL is God, and you can realize that ALL is Holy, you will find that God is teaching you even through what you deem to be the most despicable behavior that you have ever seen.
Likewise, YOU are always a Holy lesson to someone. What shall your lesson be? An example of hatred and judgment, or a pointer to the path of love?
It doesn’t really matter in the end what lesson you bring – whatever it may be, it is a Holy lesson, from one that is Holy. It is grand theater, and your role is essential to the unfolding of the plot. Like a jigsaw puzzle, every peace is critical if the whole picture is to be seen.
The Holy must also encompass the profane, for all is one – there is no separation.
Seek to be the reflection of Divine love, but know that whatever comes forth from you is a Divine lesson for someone. You are Holy…see everyone as Holy…and you may very well find the world to be utterly different from what you had assumed.
It is peace that you seek. It is the feeling of peace that we all seek.
It isn’t love that you so earnestly wish for, because the feeling of being loved deeply is that of perfect peace.
It isn’t money or wealth that you desire, for these are just outward things that can temporarily remove the impediments to your experience of perfect peace, which is what you desire more than anything else.
Yes, welcome to the masquerade ball. Everything that you thought was what you wanted is hiding behind a mask; and behind that mask is perfect peace.
“But the masks are so pretty,” you say.
Yes, they are very lovely, to be sure; but the mask isn’t what you crave. What you desire beyond all things is to be at peace – no worry, no anxiety, no fear, no self-doubt, no self-condemnation, no crazy pressure or expectations – however, the mask isn’t the answer.
Go ahead, buy the mask, and see if what I have written is not the truth. You will soon discover that the beautiful mask gradually loses its luster. It was never what you really wanted, anyway. What you need, what you crave, the only thing that will satisfy your life is PEACE. And perfect peace isn’t the mask, but what lies behind the mask.
YOU are behind the mask, and it is within you that perfect peace is found. Lay aside the trinkets and the masks, and take some time to get to know that which resides deep within you – the ONLY thing that you are truly chasing – PEACE. It’s there…waiting.
I can’t imagine anyone from my generation not knowing, (or at the very least hearing), the now iconic phrase, “shaken, not stirred.” If you don’t know, it is the way that the late Ian Fleming’s fictional British agent, 007, takes his Vodka Martinis. What difference shaking instead of stirring made I don’t know, but it helped build an interesting character. I must confess to having never tried a Vodka Martini. But, it is on my list of things to do before I die. Anyway, I was thinking about the phrase tonight, and came to see it in an entirely new light [perhaps Ian Fleming intended it to have a deeper meaning].
“Shaken, not stirred” describes the personality of agent 007 as succinctly as anything ever written. He was constantly on the threshold of death – running for his life, car chases, fights, thrown in pools with sharks, strapped in front of buzz saws, hanging from helicopters – you name the sticky spot, and he was probably placed in it at one time or another. And every time that he was in one of those spots he was, on the physical/superficial level, scared; running out of time, desperately seeking to avoid death. Just like his Vodka Martinis, he was shaken. But not once…not one, single time, did I ever get the impression that he doubted his ultimate success. Basically, he was shaken a lot but, deep down, he was never “stirred;” there was calm lurking below the raging surface of the crisis at hand. To me, that is the goal of the greatest spiritual practices – to be a James Bond Vodka Martini.
None of us will avoid being “shaken” as long as we are a part of the human race. Suffering comes, crisis comes, tragedy will pay a visit, and they will all do it more than once, too. But with a dedicated spiritual practice that has developed strong faith, our dynamic peace will never be “stirred;” there will always be calm in the consciousness that lies deep below the storm-ravaged surface.
Getting there isn’t easy – it requires a great deal of commitment to meditation and prayer to reach an understanding of your true nature. It is there that you will find the unshakeable peace that no crisis or tragedy can defeat. When one knows, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that death is but a physical illusion that does not touch that part of the eternal which is truly “you’ – you become free from being “stirred.”
I am a Hammer…a bludgeon…an energy of crushing force.
No, all of that sort of talk doesn’t fit well with the intent of this blog, and my life – a life that is directed toward being the essence of compassion and love – to finally be free of war in my mind and body. I have made great strides, and continue to do so. But, severe Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder can, in an instant, break every dish in my mental cabinet.
This dragon grew mighty and strong, undiscovered and undiagnosed, for 20 years. His abode is all but impregnable, and nearly impossible to find, nestled deep in the shadowy corners of my brain.
He lives by a code that is a secret to me. A smell, a word, an unexpected disruption to routine…all of this, and many other insidious and hidden triggers, call him forth from his dark fortress with no warning, and his shadow blackens the entire landscape of my thoughts. Perhaps only for seconds, or maybe for days, whatever the time frame, when he takes wing he usurps all control.
The Mystics of Buddhist and Hindu thought have a solution for the problem; you simply don’t attach to the thoughts, or the images, or whatever the manifestation may be. This works…I consider it to be the truth. One little glitch, though…there is no time with severe PTSD.
If you are dissociative from all of life – completely – at all times, I suspect that you would be untroubled by this dragon’s arrival; totally indifferent. This would also mean that your total separation from any emotion would cause you to be of little value to the growth of society; compassion would be a stranger to you – indifference would be the definition of your life. I am not totally dissociative, so, I am left with the reality of possessing complete control of my mind and, at other times, being completely “controlled” by a broken aspect of my mind that arises without warning with the force of a tsunami.
This dragon, PTSD, is the embodiment of rage, anger, frustration, impatience, and an insatiable desire to destroy that which has disturbed its repose – its protected solitude. He does not know the meaning of “finesse,” he is a hammer. He is a wrecking ball. He is the two-handed broadsword that cleaves with the force of an inhuman giant. His crushing force grabs your ankle as he plunges, and the weight of his power yanks you down from your post of “observer of thoughts.” He must be dealt with – you will not simply watch him with bemused detachment. To stand before me at such a time, to physically challenge me, is to invite heinous injury…and I will not know what the hammer has done until the moment has passed.
Thankfully, years removed from the harsh realities of combat, I am not confronted in such a way anymore. The dragon, however, still leaves his lair when the right trigger is touched. And what happens to the force of this inconceivably destructive energy? I internalize it, so that no one is harmed. No one but me , that is. Over time, this wrecks the strongest of bodies and minds.
Why did I write all of this? I’m not sure…maybe just to get it off of my chest. There is a bigger reason, though, and that is two wars going on right now.
Over half of the men and women that return from combat will have to live with this dragon. The majority will deny having a problem – to avoid the “stigma.” Those that do admit to the challenges will find that most of the treatments that the Veteran’s Administration uses are pretty ineffective – they prefer to push pills – it’s easier and faster; but you end up with a zombie.
Pills for the pain, pills for the anxiety/hyper-vigilance, pills for sleep, pills for depression; all that’s left after all of that is a festering pile of mush between your ears.
Here’s why I wrote this. You may very likely encounter someone coming home that “just isn’t the same,” the short fuse, the anger, the irritability. Have them call me. I KNOW this dragon. I don’t have a cure, but I know his ways. I am the Lord of the Dragons, and even this behemoth knows his days are numbered. He shall not prevail. Perhaps I can offer a way to cope to those that are suffering. I am here, and I will not be beaten.
Check him out at 
